football

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  • 20 Aug

    No I In Team

    Last night, for the first time in my life I showed up to a Mexican restaurant with a spreadsheet.

    Next time the data might be geared toward helping me pick the perfect dish for my meal, but in this case it was my cheat sheet for drafting in the most interesting fantasy football league I’ve ever done.  We figured out that I’m the only person in the history of the league — now in its fourth year — to never place in the top three, but I still find it fascinating.

    Here’s how it works.  We have eight guys who each draft four NFL teams.  Once you have your four teams, you have exclusive access to all of their players and fill out your roster using whichever of those guys you want.  The rest of it works just like any normal head-to-head league.

    Why is this so great?  First, it’s different.  Many of us play in multiple leagues and that sometimes leads to having them meld together in your mind since they’re all pretty much the same.  But what my brother and I call the “teams league” stands out because your strategy and roster moves are different.

    This format also eliminates some of the annoying things that can pop up throughout a fantasy season.  Say your top running back gets hurt.  In another league, a different owner would likely pick up the guy’s backup and you’d be out of luck.  In the teams league, you are the only one who can add him.  It also largely eliminates the frustration of teams that have multiple quality running backs but a coach who can’t decide to consistently give one of them the ball.  With two running back slots and a flex position, you can just start both of them.

    There are always a couple of players who come out of absolutely nowhere to have monster fantasy years.  Often they end up on the team of whoever is lucky enough to have a good waiver order number in the week after a breakout game.  Well, in this league it’s not up to that system.  Imagine the thrill of discovering that you have an amazing wide receiver you weren’t even counting on when drafting.

    The final benefit of this league is that the draft is REALLY fast.  You only have to make four choices, unless of course you have the last pick in which you only pick three of your teams and take the leftover.  No agonizing over which of the 18 seemingly identical third receivers you should take.  Often the fourth pick is just so you can get that team’s running back or one wide receiver with no intention of ever playing anyone else.

    This year I ended up with the Saints, Vikings, Dolphins and Jaguars.  We’ll see how it goes.

    If you want to shake up your fantasy life, I could not more highly recommend doing a teams league.

    By cjhannas football Uncategorized
  • 20 Jun

    Jersey Jinx

    I’d like to take this opportunity to apologize to Washington Nationals third baseman Ryan Zimmerman.

    This hasn’t been his best year at the plate, with just three home runs and a .229 average in 51 games.  Compare that to last year, when he played 101 games and belted 12 home runs with a .289 average.

    How is this my fault?  Well, before this season I got his jersey.  I don’t have a good history with jerseys.

    It started when I was in high school and my beloved New York Giants emerged from years of suckitude to become a contending team.  They had a star cornerback named Jason Sehorn.  I got his jersey.  He subsequently blew out his right knee (tearing both the ACL and MCL) and was never the same.

    Even player t-shirts aren’t safe.  Washington Capitals center Nicklas Backstrom experienced my curse last year when he was elbowed in the head and missed 40 games with concussion issues.

    Looking in this section of my closet, there’s another player I’ve put in jeopardy by putting his number on my back. 

    Of course, I was wearing this shirt when Eli won his second Super Bowl MVP.  I guess that’s proof he can crush any challenge.

    By cjhannas baseball football hockey Uncategorized
  • 24 May

    Best Year Ever

    This week, Washington Post columnist John Kelly has been sharing stories of people with interesting life goals — like today’s piece about a guy who has visited every county in the United States.

    Seems like a good opportunity to at least partially take care of a blog topic that my brother can attest I’ve been meaning to tackle for more than a year.

    My crazy goal — which would require winning the lottery for both free time and funds — is to see every Major League Baseball, National Football League, National Hockey League and National Basketball Association team play a home game…all in the same year (or a 12-month period).  Plus see the championship-clinching game for each league and their respective all-star game.

    I think this would be the greatest year a person could possibly have.  I’d be going to games all the time, traveling to every major city in the country and gaining at least 700 pounds from eating delicious stadium food.  Logistically, obviously it would be quite a challenge, but in a way I think it would be really fun to figure out how to get all the games in.

    Certain sports would be easy.  Baseball teams play the most games and also have a block of the year all to themselves.  Plus with the way they play on back-to-back days, and at different times of the day, it’s not hard to imagine seeing the Mets play on a Saturday night, the Yankees at 1 p.m. Sunday and then the Phillies at 8 p.m. Sunday.  That’s a good chunk of the league in just 24 hours.

    Football is the real challenge.  Without taking the risk of trying to guess which teams I think would end up hosting a playoff game, geography would be my biggest friend in safely hitting my goal in the regular season.  I envision trying to hit 1 p.m. games nearest the city where the Sunday night game is being played — or at least in a city where there is an easy flight to that site.  But the NFL also seems to be making the schedule even easier, adding more Thursday night games and continuing to have Saturday games later in the year.  It’s like they know I’m coming.

    When my Mega Millions numbers hit, this is happening.

    [Some time I’ll actually do the long-awaited sports bucket list post featuring what I’d like to see at those games.]

    By cjhannas baseball basketball football hockey life plans Uncategorized
  • 27 Apr

    Charting My Fandom

    If you are a sports team, you do not want me as a fan.

    I mentioned in a post back in February that I collect the stubs to just about every event I attend, which means I can go back and look up the results of any games for which I still have the ticket.  The result — I know that the teams I wanted to win those games went 26-37-1 with me there.

    Of course there are many variables that go into that result, and it certainly didn’t help that I back a baseball team that has had a few atrocious years.  But in 64 games, I’ve never been to more than three in a row in which my team won.  In a stretch starting with Capitals-Devils on February 27, 2002 and ending with Nationals-White Sox on June 19, 2010, I saw my teams lose 10 out of 11 games.

    Beyond the nerdily interesting task of putting more of my life in an Excel spreadsheet, reading the recaps of games stretching back to 1993 was really fascinating.

    Some interesting notes:

    -Best pitching matchup: Greg Maddux and Mike Mussina at Camden Yards in 2000.

    -Attended same games as Presidents Barack Obama and George W. Bush.

    -Saw Orioles OF Larry Bigbie get traded during a game

    -Went to a Nats game on the wrong day, got a free ticket and saw Roy Halladay pitch a CG 2-hitter to record his 21st win of the season.

    -Watched Caps winger Alex Semin get in a fight.  The video of his effort shows why this is a momentous occasion.

    -Witnessed a Chicago Bears punter — on a fake field goal — throw a 27-yard touchdown pass to linebacker Brian Urlacher to beat the Washington Redskins.

    -This season I’ve been to three Nationals games — all extra-inning wins, including a 13-inning game that featured two runnings of the illustrious Presidents Race.  I saw that happen once last year, too.

    We’ll see what happens next time.  Stay tuned.

    [Note: I found some non-game-related items as well.  Covered in this post.]

    By cjhannas baseball basketball football hockey nerdness Uncategorized
  • 03 Feb

    Hair Today, Gone Monday

    Today I had the urge to get a haircut, but opted not to because the Giants are playing in the Super Bowl.

    To a non-sports fan (and perhaps to the more rational among us), that logic seems crazy.  After all, there’s nothing about the length of my hair that will in any way affect how my favorite team plays on Sunday.  But for those who won’t shift positions in their seat during crunch time of a game for fear of throwing off whatever is working for their team, the ones who cross their fingers and make wear ridiculous-looking rally caps, there’s something to it.

    I last got a haircut on December 13.  Five days later the Giants lost to the Redskins in a listless performance that represented a low point of their season.  It seemed unlikely they would make the playoffs.  They haven’t lost since, winning their final two regular season games and three straight in the playoffs.

    Analysts would probably credit things like having some of their injured defensive players return to the lineup, or the continued maturation of an inexperienced receiving corps.  But there’s no way I would forgive myself if I visited the fine folks at Hair Cuttery and then watched the Giants lose to the Patriots.

    The hair can wait until Monday.

    By cjhannas football Uncategorized
  • 09 Sep

    Small in Stature, Big in Fun

    Few items in my life have brought joy to those close to me like Mini Football. I capitalize this palm-sized ball because it is just that special.

    Ordinarily, this is where I’d show you a picture of the magnificent Mini Football. But you’ll have to either wait for the end or scroll to the bottom for a moment. You have my roommate Mike to blame for this. I asked him about the “Hat Came Back” post the other day and he said he stopped reading at the picture.

    He’s also the latest to be indoctrinated into the wonders of Mini Football. It’s small enough that you can get in some quality tosses indoors without A) breaking anything and B) not wear out your arm when going for hours on end.

    It looks like a regular ball–leather cover, stitches, full or air–but I defy you to find another ball in existence that has brought so much entertainment in a short life span.

    The core group of Mini Football enthusiasts attended Susquehanna University sometime between 2001 and 2005. My roommate Shawn–that’s Shawn L. for you longtime readers–is certainly in the MF Hall of Fame.

    During our junior year, we had desks that faced each other on opposite sides of the room. Hour after hour passed with the ball sailing precariously over our monitors to the delight of everyone involved.

    But it was really freshman year that MF secure its place in the hearts of the masses. Pick a random night and you’d find myself, Shawn L. and our friend Mindy passing the time in my room. I’d grab the ball from the shelf next to my desk and toss it to one of them. For the next (insert a scary number here) hours, that’s all we’d do. I mean, we’d chat and whatnot and maybe there would be a movie on. But the real action was the MF flying from point to point around the room.

    The real fun came when someone made a bad throw, and the ball was no longer within anyone’s reach. We would do absolutely everything in our power to retrieve the ball without having to get up. Sometimes that meant tying together two lanyards with our keys to make a sort of lasso to snare it and pull it back. Other times we would get more adventurous and throw a shoe. If we tried five or six methods and still didn’t have the ball back–or even pushed it farther away–then someone would take one for the team and get up to get the ball.

    Sophomore year was a little tougher, mainly since Shawn L. and I lived in a tiny room with desks that practically touched one another.

    So maybe the MF was eager for us to move into a spacious suite and introduce some new people to the game. We even came up with a new contest, a version of H-O-R-S-E where you had to toss MF onto a foldout chair in order to score a “basket.” This was probably the most difficult game I have ever played. But it did lead to one instance in which I rode a bike down the hallway of our building, made a sharp left turn into our common area and tossed the ball safely onto the chair. I’m pretty sure Shawn L. didn’t even attempt that one.

    Visitors were always fond of being involved in MF action. Several also threatened to steal the beloved ball for their own use, only to be threatened with certain death.

    I can only think of one negative experience involving MF, which led to it being used solely in indoor situations.

    I’ll take you back to freshman year at SU, just outside Smith Hall where Mindy, Shawn L. and I all lived on the rocking third floor. For some reason we decided that taking the football outside, at night, was a good idea. And I guess it was for maybe 15 minutes.

    We were stationed in a small piece of grass near a streetlamp so we could see what we were doing. If I had to guess, I’d say it was easily 11 p.m. We saw a mysterious figure approaching us at a pretty slow pace. He was coming across the field hockey practice field, which was directly behind the dorm.

    When he got to us, the guy clearly on some sort of–and probably multiple–substances. He immediately launched into a slur-filled rant about the lacrosse coach being mad at us. He said we should go to his office right now and apologize for everything we’ve done.

    At this point, Mindy retreated to the nearby door and held it open. The mystery man–who was roughly 6-2, 230–became more and more insistent that we straighten things out with the lacrosse coach. I’ll take a second and point out that none of the three of us would have any reason to have even met the lacrosse coach and thus could have no beef.

    Things really got interesting when he put his arm around Shawn L., who I believe is roughly 5-6. That’s when we stopped sort of blindly agreeing with him and waiting for him to be on his merry way. We told him something like we knew we had screwed up and we were on our way to apologize with the coach. Finally we hit on the right combination of those nonsensical promises and he turned around and slowly walked away.

    We went inside with MF and decided it was probably best to keep that as an indoor game. MF has rewarded us with hours and hours and hours and hours and hours of good times. He must not be an outdoorsy kind of ball.


    The Mini Football in all its glory

    By cjhannas football Susquehanna Uncategorized
  • 25 Aug

    But the Hat Came Back

    I got a text message today basically saying, “Come get your crap.”

    OK, it wasn’t quite like that. My parents have been doing a lot of work on their house this year, which has led to a lot of cleaning out of rooms and closets.

    Those areas have quite a bit of random items left behind by me and my siblings during our various moves over the years. Fortunately I only had a TV and a winter hat to pick up. Oh and Mom made me dinner, so I can’t complain too much.

    I’m actually quite happy to have the hat back. It’s a sweet New York Giants hat I got somewhere around the 7th or 8th grade. I didn’t exactly need one when I lived in Florida, so I guess it was easily overlooked when I was packing up to leave.

    Here it is after its long journey (roughly 5 miles) to my current abode:

    My most vivid memories of this hat are from my time running track my freshman year of high school. The winter track season was my first–and only–appearance on a school team. Though we competed indoors, the practices were all outside, thus necessitating having a sweet winter hat on hand.

    Of course, it was only useful to have that hat when it actually stayed on your own head. As a sprinter, I spent 99 percent of my time running on the track while the distance runners went out into the surrounding neighborhoods for their workouts. There was one day I was finishing stretching as the distance kids were heading out for their run. I was facing the fence with my back to the track when a hand snatched the hat from my head. I barely had enough time to turn around by the time I saw my hat on top of a much shorter person’s head, with a few inches of blond hair sticking out the bottom.

    I had a decision to make–expend some effort to get it back, or just risk some potentially cold ears. The hat went for a 5-mile run without me. I don’t remember how my ears fared all exposed to the cold, but I do recall being somewhat bitter when the hat and its thief finally returned. Her name is being withheld for her own protection.

    Nobody likes a hat thief.

    By cjhannas fashion football running Uncategorized
  • 08 May

    He Needs to Find Employment

    Most people need jobs. In our economic system, the best way to secure the funds necessary for food and shelter is to perform a service in exchange for money.

    Some members of families don’t have to work because at least one person is bringing in enough cheese to cover the rest. Or for the rich or retired, they just happen to have enough money to sustain themselves for an appropriate period of time.

    Chris Henry should fall into that last group. He’s a professional football player who has collected a good amount of cash over the last few years playing for the Cincinnati Bengals. Of course that was before he was arrested multiple times and eventually kicked off the team.

    A judge says he “obviously needs to find employment,” and thus the court is going to give him “some latitude” on his current house arrest.

    In his latest scrape with the law, Henry is facing charges for assault and criminal damaging from an incident where police say he punched a student in the head and damaged the man’s car. This is the same guy who was suspended for eight NFL games last season because of his previous arrests.

    Definitely sounds like someone who deserves “latitude.” I’ve never been to Henry’s home, but I’m guessing he’s probably doing OK for himself. I imagine there are more than a few people in the United States who could get by with the resources he has on hand, without bringing in new paychecks.

    We really should be giving leeway to someone who served a combined two days in jail for multiple gun charges–including assault with a firearm–providing alcohol to minors, multiple traffic offenses and drug possession. Yeah that’s a guy who needs special treatment from the criminal justice system.

    Maybe we should give a hand to some other people looking for jobs, those who don’t have a history of criminal activity and haven’t been given multiple chances to learn what it means to be a productive member of society.

    By cjhannas football Uncategorized
  • 29 Oct

    Oh Say Can You See?

    Should I be concerned that what I’m eating for dinner is supposed to feed four people according to the box? Eh, whatever. Maybe I’ll start eating like a normal person after the marathon. Probably not.

    Seeing the Giants play in Wembley Stadium yesterday was kind of neat, though the beginning was a bit disconcerting. There was just something askew about hearing God Save The Queen before an NFL football game. I’m used to hearing the Canadian anthem at some baseball games, which due to the peaceful nature of the Canadians is almost comforting. Maybe I need to watch more events where the English are involved.

    One thing I will never get tired of at sporting events is our national anthem. I mentioned the feeling in one of my newspaper columns three years ago. I don’t know why, but when it gets to O’er the land of the free…I get chills. Every time.

    In March I ran a half-marathon. Well, due to a partially torn tendon in my foot, I ran 3 miles and walked the rest. I planned on walking the entire thing until five minutes before the race started. That’s when they played the national anthem, and had three jets fly over head. If that doesn’t give you chills and make you run, nothing will.

    The anthem tells a story, of standing strong and persevering. It has low notes and high notes, a range that is threaded together through bombs bursting in air. What makes it even more beautiful is that it can evoke the same emotions whether it’s played by the Boston Pops or belted out by Carrie Underwood. A strong version of the anthem can be done with or without words and still raise the hairs on the back of your neck.

    It can even be a time for comedy. In the Baltimore/Washington area, there is a tradition of yelling O!!!!!!! when the song gets to O say does that… as an homage to the Baltimore Orioles. At a Washington Capitals game, a fan with great timing yelled out “Stop doing that!” at the pivotal moment. It was a great moment in anthem history. Here’s a Washington Post blog on the topic.

    Ok the meal for four has been consumed. O’er the laaaaaaaaaaaand of the freeeeeeeeeeee. And the hoooooooooome of theeeee braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaave!!!!!!

    By cjhannas football hockey running Susquehanna Uncategorized writing
  • 17 Aug

    Padilla, not Vick, is True Sports Loss

    While Michael Vick considers pleading guilty to federal charges concerning dog fighting, columnists, pundits and sports fans across the country are talking about what that means for his NFL future. Also at stake is the future of the Atlanta Falcons who will probably one way or another lose their star quarterback through imprisonment or having had enough of the Vick experience.

    It’s always sad to see a person throw their livelihood away for making bad choices, especially when you’re in a position that so many other people would give anything for. It’s also sad when the fallout from those actions affects so many other people, which in Vick’s case includes the franchise that has reinvented itself solely to fit his style of play.

    But today came news that an even bigger star has lost his freedom to excel on the field and carry his team to glory. That’s the story of Jose Padilla, also known as Justice Jose Padilla.

    Maybe you’ve heard the name. He was detained by the government as an enemy combatant in the war on terror. He was held under that status without a lawyer for several years in solitary confinement. He took his case–just to get access to the legal system–all the way to the United States Supreme Court, which said he should be tried in South Carolina. Ultimately, the United States changed tactics, dropping his original charges of planning to detonate a dirty bomb and instead going after new charges in federal court of conspiring to support jihad overseas.

    Yesterday he was convicted of those charges and faces life in prison.

    That is bad new for the Washington Nationals baseball team. Two years ago Padilla became their starting catcher. Not only is he the premier defensive catcher in the league, he’s also a top hitting talent. After seeing the Nats to several titles and leading the on-field charge for the outfitting of a brilliant new stadium, Padilla now faces an eternity of bars and concrete.

    Of couse, this didn’t happen in real life. Rather, it happened in the XBOX version of MVP baseball in a franchise created by my roommates and myself. We had some wonderful players named after ourselves, but also included players like Juan Rocker and Justice Padilla to put our talent over the top.

    Prior to living in that apartment, the three of us had lived together at lovely Susquehanna University. It was there that Jason and I took a class our senior year called Law & Politics. We discussed things like the Padilla case from the legal standpoint and how that affected, and was affected, by politics. Absolutely fascinating.

    The fall after taking the class there was an opening on the Supreme Court. While most people interested in the debate talked about real candidates, we instead went with more unconventional options. Our two favorite were George W. Bush and Jose Padilla–hence, Justice Padilla.

    Sadly, neither were nominated nor confirmed. I still think Bush would have been a great option. At least give it a shot. You’re in the second, and last possible, term as president. You are the guy who nominates candidates to the court. It’s a lifetime appointment with a good salary. Why not try?

    Of course after discussing the issue with the professor of Law & Politics, it became clear that President Bush is not a great candidate. To be confirmed he would need a huge supporting cast in the Senate (which was eroding at the time), and behind that would need a populous willing to support that decision. Oh and the whole giving up the presidency thing. But hey, there’s always hope for a future very popular president in the waning days of his term right?

    By cjhannas baseball football Supreme Court Susquehanna Uncategorized video games
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