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  • Best Year Ever

    This week, Washington Post columnist John Kelly has been sharing stories of people with interesting life goals — like today’s piece about a guy who has visited every county in the United States.

    Seems like a good opportunity to at least partially take care of a blog topic that my brother can attest I’ve been meaning to tackle for more than a year.

    My crazy goal — which would require winning the lottery for both free time and funds — is to see every Major League Baseball, National Football League, National Hockey League and National Basketball Association team play a home game…all in the same year (or a 12-month period).  Plus see the championship-clinching game for each league and their respective all-star game.

    I think this would be the greatest year a person could possibly have.  I’d be going to games all the time, traveling to every major city in the country and gaining at least 700 pounds from eating delicious stadium food.  Logistically, obviously it would be quite a challenge, but in a way I think it would be really fun to figure out how to get all the games in.

    Certain sports would be easy.  Baseball teams play the most games and also have a block of the year all to themselves.  Plus with the way they play on back-to-back days, and at different times of the day, it’s not hard to imagine seeing the Mets play on a Saturday night, the Yankees at 1 p.m. Sunday and then the Phillies at 8 p.m. Sunday.  That’s a good chunk of the league in just 24 hours.

    Football is the real challenge.  Without taking the risk of trying to guess which teams I think would end up hosting a playoff game, geography would be my biggest friend in safely hitting my goal in the regular season.  I envision trying to hit 1 p.m. games nearest the city where the Sunday night game is being played — or at least in a city where there is an easy flight to that site.  But the NFL also seems to be making the schedule even easier, adding more Thursday night games and continuing to have Saturday games later in the year.  It’s like they know I’m coming.

    When my Mega Millions numbers hit, this is happening.

    [Some time I’ll actually do the long-awaited sports bucket list post featuring what I’d like to see at those games.]

  • Gothamed Government

    Whatever you think about budget problems or political clashes, our government has one major problem nobody is talking about.

    Members of the president’s Cabinet who head the departments of State, Treasury, Defense, Interior, Agriculture, Commerce, Labor, Health and Human Services, Housing and Urban Development, Energy, Education, Veterans Affairs, and Homeland Security all get the title of “secretary.”

    There’s a certain status that comes with such a title, a force behind saying “I’m the secretary of Education.”

    But what about the Justice Department?  The guy with that Cabinet-level position is Attorney General Eric Holder.  Boring.  Ambiguous.  Without gravitas.

    How much cooler would he be as Secretary of Justice Eric Holder?  I can’t think of a more forceful line to have on your resume than “Secretary of Justice.”  You pretty much have to drop your voice a few octaves when saying that.

    Imagine the boost to morale at the Justice Department.  Right now, their boss is the attorney general.  Under my proposal, they go to work every day under the watch of the secretary of justice.  I discussed this idea with a friend, who said that would be like working for Batman.

    Big case involving the U.S. government comes up at the Supreme Court?  Turn on the Justice Signal.

    Come on, America.  Let’s make this happen!

    May 20, 2012 DC Uncategorized
  • We’re Going to Overtime

    If you like your baseball games to end in nine innings, don’t watch one I attend.

    Last night I went to my fourth Nationals game of the season — all of which have gone into extra innings (10, 13, 10, 11).  Unfortunately, the 2-1 loss to the Orioles broke my winning streak to start the year.

    Of course it was still a baseball game, and thus extremely fun.  We saw the rare occurrence of two balls being thrown into the dugout within a span of five innings.  The Orioles also got their first run after a ground ball up the middle hit off the pitcher’s foot and caromed 9382937 feet into the air.

    AV, who was in attendance, took a picture of me:

    Ok, so maybe she was taking a picture of the nice sunset and I happened to be sitting on that side of the stadium.  But you can’t prove that.  Um, unless maybe you ask her.  In which case she is lying.

    I also took a picture of her empty seat (before she arrived).  You’ll notice Nats phenom Bryce Harper is in this one too, after hitting a foul ball to my right:

    For your planning purposes, my next game is Friday June 1.  I’m feeling 12 innings for that one.

    May 19, 2012 baseball Uncategorized
  • Rolling Along

    I haven’t counted myself, but Blogger tells me this is post No. 500.

    As I got close to this milestone, I started thinking about ways in which I could do something special to mark the occasion.  Instead, I sat on 499 for days without posting anything.

    So to get the ball rolling again, let me update you on something that’s been keeping me pretty busy.  About six weeks ago I wrote about finishing the book draft, and since then I’ve been deep into reading the whole thing cover-to-cover and doing a round of edits.

    I finished my read-through last weekend, and am now in the process of making all of those changes in the electronic version.  It’s been really interesting to get feedback from my select group of readers and combine that with my own views upon experiencing the full story.  If only I had an intern to make the eye-numbing changes on so many pages.

    The good thing is that I feel much better about the book after both reading it myself and hearing good things from others.  It’s not that I doubted myself that much, but this is the first time I’ve ventured into this kind of project so there was just no way to really know what I had.

    Soon I’ll be moving onto the next step of getting closer to being able to share it with everyone.  Details as they come.

    My special gift for this historic post — my soundtrack for today’s editing work:

    May 17, 2012 Uncategorized writing
  • Ooh La Lolly Lolly

    To many people, golf is the most boring sport on Earth.  It’s a game for old guys at country clubs that won’t let you play if you don’t have a collared shirt.

    To those people, I present the Golf Boys. This video came out last summer, but I just read about it the other day in the New York Times.  I’ve watched it easily a dozen times since then. 

    The video represents so many things I like about breaking the boring golf stereotypes with a group of guys who are clearly having fun with the game and not worried about offending the “tradition.”  Best of all, the guy in the overalls with no shirt won the Masters this year.  That would be the Masters that’s played at a club so static it doesn’t allow female members.

    Did I mention the guy in the overalls, Bubba Watson, WON THE MASTERS?!  You certainly would never see Jack Nicklaus doing this.  I hope one of these guys wins every single PGA tournament forever.

    Today I stumbled on even more magic from this group.  They made a pair of behind the scenes videos — one for the singing portion and another for the dancing.  You’re welcome:

    May 11, 2012 golf Uncategorized video
  • Watch Yourself

    Things in my running life sometimes happen in freakish ways.

    In 2009, I got a stress fracture in my foot, and a week later ran what is still by far my fastest 5K. You may remember that earlier this year I tore a meniscus in my knee while boarding a Metro train and couldn’t run for weeks.

    I’ve done a few half-marathons on ridiculously little training and finished in surprisingly good times.

    A duck laughed at me when I ran by.  Twice.  And now, a watch I have put through all kinds of torturous conditions broke when I set it down on my desk:

    Those of you who have seen the area on my dresser where I kept this watch might be saying, “But Chris, don’t you have another watch that usually sits right next to this one?”

    Yes.  Yes I do.  The other one is a GPS watch, which I adore, but mainly use for longer runs and those in which I don’t know the landmarks for mile points.  The now-broken watch was perfectly suited for shorter runs of two or four miles, with the exact information I would want to see on each screen and easy to use buttons I never have to think about.

    (Wait, is it crazy that 99 percent of my runs cover even-numbered distances?  I will not run five miles on my own — four or six, pick one.)

    But all is not sad in watch land.  Obviously I can use the GPS for shorter runs, but after a trip to REI this morning to get a new “other” watch, the extremely helpful salesperson told me the one I want is going on sale next week.  Score.

    Until next time.

    May 10, 2012 running Uncategorized
  • If Left Is Wrong, I Don’t Want To Be Right

    I took a class in college called “Diversity in American Politics” where on the first day the professor asked us to take out a sheet of paper and write down the ways in which we were “diverse.”

    The purpose of the exercise was to quickly disassociate the word “diversity” with “race” and see the other ways in which similar people can be classified.  For me, one of those characteristics is being left-handed, something a very cursory search says makes me one of about 10 percent of the population.

    According to my friend Jackie, another lefty, it also makes us “awesome.”  After reading a list the other day of the “Downsides of Being Left-Handed” I sent the link to a few lefties, asking for their thoughts on the article, which things they do with a certain hand and what’s great about being left-handed.

    The responses were both interesting and uplifting.  I love being left-handed, but bringing out that community only buoyed my pride.

    One of the things the article said is that lefties die earlier than righties.  But as Jackie points out, that’s because this world is not built for us.  She and I went to college together, and in one of the academic buildings, the classrooms have desks attached to the chairs — most designed for right-handed people.  She said she always raced to class to claim the ones more comfortable for us, while I remember being lazy and just adapting a slightly awkward, sideways sitting style.

    Even in kindergarten we faced the chronic shortage of scissors built for us, leaving myself, roommate MR and my cousin Lauren resigned to cutting with our right hands.  Jackie told me she has her own special set of lefty scissors she protects with her life.

    And then there’s writing.  We can’t effectively use whiteboards without immediately erasing what we just wrote.  Spiral notebooks?  As Lauren says, we can only utilize about three-fourths of the page since the metal prevents our writing hand from going all the way to the left.

    That’s not to mention the indentations the spirals leave.  In high school, I started a system of using the notebooks backwards — putting the spiral on the right so that I could write on the whole page.  I’m sure it confused the heck out of anyone borrowing my notes, but it worked for me.  I was ecstatic when I found the notebook I write in now, which has the spiral at the top.

    But buying things like that notebook is another problem.  If you’re right-handed, you’ve probably never noticed the placement of the credit card terminals at stores.  Take a look next time.  I would estimate 98 percent of them are mounted just to the right of some kind of obstacle — no issue for you when it’s time to sign, but for us it’s right back to the spiral problem.  We want someplace to put our hand too!

    And righties, please be mindful of the way you replace the “pen.”

    Lauren said: “Righties always leave it facing their way and it’s awkward to get, especially when you have a purse or a bag of items in your other hand. My solution? Always leave it sticking up in the hole in the middle so that no matter who approaches after you, it’s convenient to grab.”

    Eventually these things all add up.  It’s like putting a houseplant in the oven and expecting it to live.

    I think there’s a general idea that in some sports, like baseball, being left-handed is an advantage, and that certainly can be true.  But Lauren also pointed out something I’ve never thought of — lefties who have a tendency to pull the ball as a hitter really do themselves a disservice.

    “How can you get a base hit if the ball always goes straight towards the base you’re running to?” she asked.

    Despite all of those challenges, we persevere.  We find ways to take what the righty world gives us and make our own rules to get by.  I never knew before embarking on this post, but Lauren and I use our utensils the exact same way.  I remember going out for plenty of family meals during which the adults would try to work out the best place to seat the lefties so our left elbows didn’t smash into the right elbow of our neighbor if we used a knife at the same time.  Turns out neither I nor Lauren cut with our left hands anyway.

    One thing we’re good at is finding each other.  “I do notice that I always catch myself noticing other left handed people,” Jackie said.  So true.  When I worked in retail, I frequently had quick conversations with people who signed the receipt with their left hand.

    But best of all, I think we all share a pride in our diversity.

    “There are fewer of us, so I like to think of us as an elite club,” Lauren said.  “Growing up, I always thought it made me super cool.”

    I’ll let Jackie have the last word, which I think sums up my feelings too:  “Left handedness is amazing.  I would not change it for the world”

  • Teddy Rooseawesome

    If I acquired a very specific time machine, I would go back to the early 1900s and work in the Teddy Roosevelt White House.

    You probably have a vague idea about his outsized personality and maybe a few of his policy initiatives.  But after a reading a book about a trip he took after the 1912 election, I’m convinced he is the most epic person our country will ever have as president.

    Quick history refresher — Roosevelt took over as president following William McKinley’s assassination in 1901.  He was 42 years old.  Teddy served out that term, got re-elected for a second before leaving the White House in 1909.  After sitting out four years, he returned as a third-party candidate for the 1912 election, which he lost.

    Candice Millard’s book “The River of Doubt” recounts Roosevelt’s journey to Brazil to map an uncharted Amazon tributary.  It features not only amazing details about the expedition itself, but an excellent setup on Roosevelt himself that really gives you a sense of who he was and why he would go on such a journey.

    In 1909, just three weeks after leaving office, he went on an expedition to Africa collecting specimens that went to the Smithsonian.  A rhino he brought back is still on display at the National Museum of Natural History in Washington.  It’s possible to imagine a few of our most recent presidents doing something like this.

    It’s hard to see many of them doing the rest of what Millard describes.

    First, while in office, Millard quotes Roosevelt talking about swimming in D.C.’s Rock Creek and in the Potomac River, including one outing that included the French ambassador.  I think if President Obama did this today, the Internet would break.

    But what really sets Roosevelt apart from his colleagues is his Amazon trip.  Millard describes him as a man who deals with disappointment by subjecting himself to intense physical effort, which leads him to such an extreme journey.  Initially Roosevelt set off to descend a known river, the Tapajos, but after a suggestion by Brazil’s minister of foreign affairs, he opted to explore what was known as the River of Doubt.

    I get the feeling you could challenge Roosevelt to do just about anything.

    Millard, with the help of journals written by Roosevelt, his son Kermit, a Brazilian military officer who helped lead the expedition and other members, paints in vivid detail what the men faced.  They had no idea how long the river was, exactly where it went, how long it would take to navigate or what/whom they would encounter along the way.  Add in the logistical challenges of making the trip through rapids too severe for the boats they brought and provisions ill-suited for that type of expedition, and you begin to get a sense of the challenges they endured.

    Oh yeah, did I mention one of the men was the FORMER PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES?  He was gone for months with little known about what he was doing or if he was still alive.  Can you begin to imagine that happening today?  I had to stop every few chapters and think about this, letting the insanity (as seen through modern eyes) of Roosevelt sink in.

    Eventually, they make it out, but not until after death and disease ravaged the men.  When he made it back to the U.S., some prominent figures doubted Roosevelt’s claims of traversing the River of Doubt.  But when he gave his first speech about the expedition in Washington, Millard writes that 5,000 people showed up, including “everyone from ambassadors to Supreme Court justices to members of President Wilson’s own cabinet.”

    If you like American history at all, you have to read this book.  It’s absolutely fascinating.

    One final note.  Millard talks about Roosevelt speaking at a rally a week before the 1912 election.  She writes that he “had a voice that sounded as if he had just taken a sip of helium” — a description I found surprising given his physical stature.  She goes on to say “…he talked fast, pounded his fists, waved his arms and sent a current of electricity through the crowd.”  All I could think of after reading that was Dwight Schrute’s dictatorial speech from The Office:

    (Sidenote: finding usable NBC video is infuriating.)

    April 30, 2012 books nerdness Uncategorized
  • A Leg Up

    Selling me a product is really easy.

    That’s not to say I’m a sucker consumer, it’s just that one feature is guaranteed to make me choose your item over a competitor’s.  The answer?  Insane legroom.

    Last weekend I decided it was time to replace the desk chair I had been using since my sophomore year of college.  It served admirably — except the few…or many times I leaned back to far and fell over — but sometimes even good relationships must come to an end.

    I went to Staples, which in addition to having 74,000 kinds of pens also has quite an array of chairs.  Fortunately, I quickly narrowed down the field to two candidates.  Unfortunately, they happened to be almost back-to-back, meaning I had quite a walk to shuttle between them during the all-important sit testing.

    I really could have gone with either of them, but when I raised one to its highest level and sat down, I felt uncomfortably high.  As a six-foot-three-inch person, that’s quite a rare experience.  I bought the chair.

    Buying my car in 2004 was a similar experience.  I climbed in for the test drive and reflexively slid the seat all the way back.  That’s what I had done in every car I had driven before that day, usually leaving me to just deal with getting as close to comfortable as I could get.

    But in this case, it was too far.  It was the first time I felt like I couldn’t reach the pedals.

    Perhaps this advice to manufacturers is limited to certain products, but if someone* makes a soda with amazing leg room, I’ll definitely buy it.

    *These people would be Pepsi, since Pepsi is amazing.

    April 30, 2012 car Uncategorized
  • That’s The Ticket

    Growing up in the Washington, D.C., area meant taking trips to experience everything the city has to offer, from the Smithsonian museums and the Washington Monument, to the mint and the Capitol.

    Going through a stack of old tickets for my last post, I came across some other items like this:

    It’s a pass to sit in the gallery of the Senate from a day in the summer of 1993, when my grandmother took my siblings and I to see the confirmation hearing for Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

    For those who don’t know, if you want to watch the excitement in the Senate or the House, you can go to the office of your senator or representative and get one of these passes.  Of course, they don’t really check if you live in their district.  This can lead to some fun.

    During my senior year of high school, our entire class went to Capitol Hill for a field trip.  I don’t remember having any actual assignment other than attending either a House or Senate session.  The rest of the day was up to us.  So we invented a little game called “How Many Passes Can You Get?”

    It went something like this:

    -Go to one of the House office buildings and walk into any open office
    -Be sure to note the state listed outside the door
    -Pretend to be from that state — the more obscure the town you can pull, the better
    -Bonus points for an accent
    -Repeat as much as possible

    I hope kids still do this.

    Another piece of my childhood I stumbled across was a memento from our trip to the Indianapolis Motor Speedway.  We were in Indiana for a family reunion and visited the Indy 500 venue, which included a pretty awesome cruise around the track itself in a bus:

    Finally, the ticket from my time seeing the Dead Sea Scrolls.  On the morning of my brother’s wedding, we had some time to kill, and with this museum near our hotel, a few family members went to check out the exhibit.  The group included my cousin, Lauren, who completely followed through on a joke we made in the gift shop by making me this t-shirt:

    Definitely the most exclusive souvenir I have.

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