George Orwell’s “1984” is a book I’m pretty sure that most people have tackled at some point in their life. For me, this was my second time.

The first was the summer before my senior year in high school, which is now a whopping 8 years in the past. As I read I didn’t remember much from that first encounter. Actually, only two things stand out and really neither has much to do with the plot or themes.

One is how almost useless it felt for me to read the book at the time. That’s not to say it wasn’t a good read or that I didn’t enjoy the act itself. Rather, in an academic sense it made absolutely no difference.

My sophomore and junior years at the illustrious Oakton High School I was enrolled in advanced English classes. That meant that not only did I have to do more summer reading than the “regular” class, but it also required papers and discussions on each one. Senior year I decided to take the English side a bit easier since I was taking on AP Calculus and AP Government.

That turned out to be a great decision for my sleep schedule. On the first day of class we were given a writing assignment. It was some sort of college essay that was roughly two pages. And it was due by Thanksgiving. I should have started bringing a pillow to class. No mention of “1984” whatsoever. None. The period itself was divided–half hour of class, then lunch, then the last hour of class. That meant that any quiz or graded item was done before lunch and I spent the hour conked out on my desk. I can’t imagine what would have happened had I stayed awake the whole time. Though I’m not sure I could have improved on my roughly 105% average in the class. That’s probably also the reason the teacher never bothered to wake me up.

I remember sitting on our front porch to read a good portion of the book. The other distinct memory is the image I had of the main female character, Julia. One of the sometimes jarring things about watching a movie version after you have read a book is how different the actor is from what you had pictured while reading. For me, Julia was Britney Spears from a video that I will now look up online because I’m happy to say I don’t know the name of it.

Hold please.

Ok I’m back. It was the video for “Oops I Did It Again.” I think Britney became my Julia because that video was on TV that summer, and Orwell describes her as having some sort of jumpsuit type attire. If only he had predicted K-Fed’s influence and the emergence of Trainwreck Britney.

Actually, I’m going to argue that he did. These two people who work for the same basic entity end up in a pretty inexplicable relationship. It’s wrong on many levels and yet they become intimate very quickly. They are eventually exposed and beaten down both physically and mentally by guards and drugs. They emerge with a relationship that will never be the same, and neither looks remotely the same.

Maybe Orwell was the original TMZ.