If you want some of my future wealth, you should ask now.

I don’t want to be one of those people who wins the lottery and all of a sudden has a bunch of new friends and “cousins” looking for a piece of the pie. Your request will be denied.

I mention this now because I am about to take part in my first and last attempt at amassing mass fortune with absolutely no effort.

A few months ago, AV and I were talking about various entrepreneurial ventures for which we had ideas but no funding. I may have suggested helpful things like robbing banks or starting a pyramid scheme, but she had a better idea: “We’re playing Mega Millions.”

Of course, if you’re going to play the lottery, you need a plan. We have a few simple rules for our attempt. First, we’re making one try — no continually chasing long odds for us (though we later amended that to each one of us buying tickets once, so two total attempts). Second, we decided to play only when the jackpot got above $75 million. Friday’s drawing is for a mere $312 million.

And then there are the numbers.

We decided since we are only playing one time, we could go ahead and come up with two sets of numbers. They include things like our ages, her lucky number, a lucky number she picked for me, part of my parents’ garage code and the season number from the Simpsons DVD set I was watching at the time.

Our magic formula is secret

So here’s the deal. On the extremely improbably chance we win on Friday (or Tuesday), you better get in your funding request now.

One in 175 million odds don’t come around every day.