You have the Internet (I know, tremendous guess on my part). That means that you come across daily lists of the 12 signs you’re this or 10 things only X people understand.
But usually if you’re in that X group there are only a few that truly apply, and a couple that kind of do. You see people post the list to Facebook with a comment like “#7!!!! Oh and #5.”
This list about the difficulties faced by tall people hits about 90 percent for me.
1. Comically low shower heads? I’ve encountered this in a bunch of hotel rooms. It was also an easy deal-breaker at one place when I was deciding where to move last year.
2. “Oh, did I hit your leg?” Yes, sorry. They don’t fit entirely on my side of the table. Good thing my knees are well used to nailing the table itself, so you are unlikely to injure me. Bonus related item: seating on airplanes and the Metro goes like this:
3. If you ask nicely, I have zero problem grabbing things from high places. I recognize this is one of my duties as a tall American. I would say this happens roughly three times a year at the grocery store, and although I would enjoy being compensated in Bagel Bites, I have yet to demand payment.
4/5. Hahahahaha. I have no idea how they got such an accurate drawing of me trying on clothes. The range of thoughts starts so positively as the shirt goes on, but then I look down at the sleeves and wonder where the rest of them went. Often I merely make note of styles and go home to buy the tall size online (because obvi they don’t have them in the store).
6. If you’re shorter than say 5’5″ I’m risking great injury giving you a hug. I will, but I’m there is great peril invovled. Oh, you’re 5’9″? Your hug comes with bonus Bagel Bites from #3 to show my appreciation.
7. Just like the showerheads in #1, things are often put in place for average people, which I totally understand. I have adapted to the art of standing reallllllly far away or squatting down to get a good mirror view. Actually, these techniques are exactly the same as with a short shower. At my house though, this is not an issue:
8. I would never bother trying to take a bath. But a similar situation crops up on couches in normal people’s homes. In my life, there’s been exactly one couch I’ve stretched out on without having to curl up my legs or drape them over the edge. Well there was at least, until I moved and got a new couch and that number shot all the way up to two:
I cannot describe what kind of heaven this is.
9. It’s rare that I ever have someone in the seat behind me, so I’m not counting this as a real issue. Though I will say that when I first got in my current car for a test drive, I slid the seat all the way back out of habit and was shocked to find I couldn’t reach the peddles. That was an amazing selling point.
10. I believe this has happened exactly zero times. But, I think that has something to do with the fact that if there is a group shot, and it’s being taken by one of us, it’s going to be the one with the longest arms. And that would be me. I don’t think I’m going to cut myself out.
11. There’s no real textual point here, but the picture is a good one to end on. How tall am I? Six-foot-three. Do I know this because that’s what they measured at the doctor’s office? Hahahaha. No. Around age 14 my experience with a nurse checking my vitals started going like this:
Nurse: Okay go ahead and stand against the wall there.
Me: (stands against the wall with the measuring device).
Nurse: (half reaches her hand up, looks around for a chair) “Um…”
Me: (waits)
Nurse: So…do you know how tall you are?
Me: I think like [insert current height]?
Nurse: Do you feel like you’ve grown lately?
Me: Maybe?
Nurse: I’ll just put [whatever height I said].
Me: Okay.
Eventually I did figure out that the best method was to grab the thing above my head and do my best to slide it into the right position myself, then read what it says and tell the nurse. They probably should comp me a couple of co-pays for my work.