Get Two Beers and Jump


By now you have surely heard about the JetBlue flight attendant who had a run-in with a passenger, cursed out everyone on board and slid down the emergency slide to instant fame.

Of course he also grabbed two beers on his way out of the plane, leading to this touching tribute last night from Jimmy Fallon. His song “Get Two Beers and Jump” should definitely catch on as a way of describing any moment where you just say “@$#% it, I’m done with this.” (Also note that half of the crowd can’t clap on beat, some not even close).

Having spent a number of years in the service industry, I must say I don’t for a second fault this guy. It doesn’t matter how patient you are, there are days that the public seems united in a quest to frustrate you as much as possible.

When I worked for a certain shoe brand franchise, we had a program that allowed podiatrists to give us a “prescription” of a customer’s footwear needs. The customer got 10 percent off their purchase if they had one of the slips, and we got a clear idea of what they needed. The system was tremendously helpful since most people would come back from their doctor and only vaguely describe what they were supposed to be looking for.

One customer didn’t understand the system. We needed the slip to send back to the parent company in order to get reimbursed for the discount. He didn’t get that we needed one every time he bought shoes.

I did not like this man (call him Will), but fortunately he usually dealt with one of the other managers. That is, until the other manager — also named Chris — left the company. That meant that every time this guy called and asked for Chris, I had to help him.

The first time, I think I spent at least half an hour on the phone trying to explain the system and why I couldn’t just give him the discount. It’s not like I didn’t want to help people, but if you make my life difficult you are much less likely to get a hand.

Those who have worked in retail, especially in management, know that there are thousands of ways you can give people discounts. College student who could get a more expensive shoe if you give them a break? Senior citizen discount! Fifty-year-old who served in the Army 20 years ago? Active duty discount! A really nice customer right after someone who demanded the world? Well imagine that, a coupon from the health fair we went to last weekend!

Will went for more of the entitlement route, expecting us to just give him the discount because he felt he deserved it. At the end of that loooong first call, he demanded to speak to our corporate office in D.C. One problem — the corporate office was in Delaware, and if you know me at all you understand that this led to another 10 minute conversation about that very fact. In the end, he got the number to one of our stores in D.C., and I later got a call from the manager of that store wondering why I had unleashed that hell on his day.

I last worked at that store in July of 2007, and if you want to read some blogs written out of pure frustration I recommend the period beginning around the fall of 2005.

A few choice entries:

Listen Up

Um, Do I Know You?

Depository Please Receptacle of Man

Now That’s a Good Question

Please Make it Stop

Oh For the Love of Pete

Enjoy.

August 11, 2010 By cjhannas shoes Uncategorized Share:
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